Day 4. How Blue is My Sapphire - Part I

Hello friends. Here I am with another short story. I started writing this one few months back for one of the contests but could never finish it. So here in the blog marathon month, picking up from the past I present you. 'How Blue is my sapphire' titled by famous author Anita Nair as this one was for one of the contests by her.

Dear you,

Yes you. The way you are, to me, as a part of me. You were and will always be my Bondhu. Life can be gruesome, painfully killing and reclusive of us but we have to learn to trust and move on. Reaching you this Friday.

Yours choti.

I was her ‘bondhu’ and she my ‘choti’, my most adorable ‘choti’, twenty two years back. My pristine moments with her were free of any boundaries, inhibitions, desires and selfishness. All they were life, sheer life and while all these years, I yearned for some more time and blissful moments with her, I failed to listen that faint rumbling, thundering in the shudders of my inner folds. I received the telegram this morning. She is coming to me today. I longed this day for years, but when it is shinning right on my face, the dullness refuses to bear the gleam. Standing in this deserted, dry land covered with occasional trees near the lake, with Sunny in my hands, I wait for his vet to come and begin with the procedures. Dreading to face the moments ahead I pull Sunny closer to me. He was a 5 day old pup when I got him home fifteen years back and since then we have lived our lonely lives in the companionship of each other. My heart perplexed with the complexities of extreme emotions which life decided to offer in a single moment, I dread to receive my past on a fresh page. I need to write with the realms of reality and hope to be a better writer this time. All of us live with our past. All of us allow it to shape our future. But some of us know how to shrug the past. I think that is who I am. I am the creator, the divine, the reflection of my inner God. I will shape up my life as I want it. I allowed it to define my present but I deny it the rights today. I don’t know why I am allowing it to happen when she didn’t even turn to look back on what she left behind that day.

The humidity has been soaring up high since morning. It takes efforts to draw life out of this almost dead weather. It has shrugged off emotions like me, making the surround soulless and completely languor. I am better in the car but soon Dr Farhad would be here. There are still five minutes left in the appointed time. Sunny’s eyes are still closed but he opens them heavily in between reassuring his mortality. I took time to get convinced but this is appropriate for him and for me too. He refuses to eat or drink and his condition fails to improve even with medication. It’s been days and it was getting painful for both of us to see him passing like this.

I throw a queasy glance over the twinned watch which successfully supplanted my fondness for the earlier one, years back. I loved the earlier one too but this one was special. Choti gifted me this on my birthday when I was distraught with losing one. My favourite watch just stopped being one day, vanishing inexplicably, as if giving way to the newness in my life. It was absolutely similar to the lost one. Same white circular dial hemmed in a golden ring with light brown leather straps.

Its time. Her train would be arriving in another half an hour.

Would love to see you back tomorrow to see how the story progresses. 

Day 3. Sounds of Love - Part 3

If you missed the earlier portions, you can catch with part 1 and part 2 here.

The next day tension was building up in one of the rooms of Bhasker eye hospital. Shobhna could not sit contained in the corridor. She walked to and fro outside the cabin impatiently, her pace increasing with the time passing by. Inside, Ria’s heart was pounding in anticipation of the results and also from an unexplained feeling which was lingering within since yesterday. The ecstasy was mutual. Her heart was slipping away dissolving her in the oneness of the moment in which she embodied the upsurge of her emotions. Dheer was also feeling flushed with the ongoing fight within. The microscopic examination needed his professional precision and he tried his best.

The lights in the examination room went off. Ria blinked her strained eyes. Dheer poured few drops of a soothing eye drop, helped her to get down from the examination table and move to the adjacent consultation room. Shobhna moved in with weakened steps. The silence in the room felt ghostly for a moment and waited for the expert prognostication. ‘It is the rarest of the rare case kaki, but it can be treated. I have personally attended few of such cases. I am sanguine Ria will be able to see after this surgery.’ Dheeraj spoke in a firm but low voice. ‘You can get ready. We will go to Mumbai tomorrow only. The surgery will be done in a month after some medication and treatments.’

Things were happening too fast. It was difficult to understand what overwhelmed Ria. Her dream to see through all she wanted to coming true or the charm of an inadvertent feeling which was too capturing and spreading all over her.

They stayed in Dheeraj’s official flat which was a sprawling bungalow. Shobhna took over the kitchen responsibilities and soon got accustomed to the way of living in a metro. Dheeraj appointed Rabia from the hospital for administering the medical requirements of Ria in his absence. He spent his evenings with Ria in the garden. They spoke for hours together and Shobhna watched them quietly, her heart growing ambitious for Ria. They drew closer to each other but an unexpected fear gripped Dheer. He feared of losing her after the surgery. He could never gather enough courage to concede the mark and the reason for it. The feeling of an anticipated devastation would possess him in lonely nights and he felt like holding Ria tight and never letting her go. Oblivious to Dheer’s fears, Ria was happy with the blessings life was showering on her.

Finally the day arrived. The surgery was about to begin. As Ria slips into the effect of anesthesia, gaining consciousness and losing it again, she hears him whispering into his ears. ‘I was not wrong Ria. It was just an accident but I have been punished far beyond. I didn’t mean to hurt her, yet she pounced on me with a burning stick. I know you would feel betrayed seeing my face after the surgery and I can’t hurt you.’ Dheer voice withered away as Ria became unconscious.

It was the first thought that came to her as she woke up. He was gone. And, soon, this bedroom, the house in whose eastern corner it sat, and the tiny garden outside with its gnarled old red hibiscus and the half-grown mango tree they had planted together, all those would be gone as well. It was the strangest feeling ever. As she stepped out in the blurred world outside the dimly lit room, her head throbbed with heaviness and eyes pained. She couldn’t see anyone around, not yet with the bandages still intact. Dheer,’ she called for him with feelings of anxiety and delight but her voice muffled. ‘You need to rest ma’am.’ Rabia took her back to the bed. ‘Where is Dheer?’ Ria was anxious. She closed her eyes inside the white rolled cloth and stuffed cotton pads as pain gripped her again but her thoughts wandered in imagination of the unexplored world outside and Dheer. ‘He shall be visiting you soon. He is not at home right now. Not since morning.’ ‘He is gone. I know he is gone.’ Ria muttered and faded, as her slender body started reacting to the drugs infused. The prick didn’t pain but the separation did. Dheer’s words reeled into her subconscious mind all this while after the surgery. She didn’t hear from him since the day of her surgery.

The day had finally strolled in. Today Ria’s bandage are going to open. She asks aai whether Dheer would be around but Shobhna is not sure. Dheeraj hardly came home these days. The bandages start getting rolled out leaving the heart pumping with an increased pace keeping up to beat the anxiety building up within Ria and everywhere else. As the cotton swabs get removed and Ria opens her eyes slowly to step into the world of her dreams, the eyes strain. There is a bright haze. She blinks, rests the eyes to overcome the strain as instructed and opens them again. The haze continues and refuses to fade. She closes the eyes impatiently and opens again. Tears stray down uncontrollably and she shouts, ‘I can’t see anything.’ Dheer smiles from the edge of the door and rushes past everyone. Ria sobs in his arms. Outside the unpredictable Mumbai rains rolled down the curtains.

So that’s how I crafted the story. But would love to know your twist in the tale. Write down how you would have ended this story.

Day 2. Sounds of Love - Part 2

Welcome back friends. Here I am with the part 2 of Sounds of Love. You can catch with part 1 here. Hope you had a wonderful Saturday evening and wishing you a splendid Sunday ahead. Let us roll on the music …

Few kilometers away at the Najod railway station, the signals were turned green to flag in, the train coming from Mumbai. The platform was crowded in patches under the limited and holed up shelter. The floor veiled with wet mud in that commotion. The loudspeakers came alive and shrieked to announce the arrival of the ‘Mahoba express’. Shobhna glanced at the watch again as the train crawled in screeching and halted at platform number one. First class AC coaches were far ahead beyond the refuge of the shed. Sampat kaka offered to go alone. ‘Tai you stay here. I will go and get Dheeraj baba. There is no point getting wet.’ She sighed in approval. Sampat left tearing away and becoming one in the crowd. She couldn’t even tell him about Dheeraj’s identification mark.

‘Sampat kaka,’ a confident but unfamiliar voice stopped Sampat and he turned around trying to read through the faces intending at him. A pleasant grin took over the aged and crumpled face of Sampat kaka as one of them came under his umbrella. ‘Dheeraj baba, had you not called, I wouldn’t have recognized you. Look at you, all grown up and what about this mark on your face?’ The smile almost vapourised from the glowing face of Dheeraj. ‘This has a story. You want to hear everything here only under this rain? Are you not planning to take me home?’ Dheeraj brushed off laughingly. Shobhna was looking anxiously ahead trying to catch from the traces of Sampat. 

‘Shobhna kaki, how are you?’ Dheeraj said reaching to her feet but Shobhna pulled him midway and hugged him. Her eyes swell with surfaced water but before they could cross and roll over, Shobhna cleared them with the edge of her sari. ‘I am fine beta. How was your journey?’ Trying to read through the face of Dheeraj, she smiled.  Dheeraj doesn’t like the mention about the scar and the incident which brought it. ‘It was  good kaki. Let us go home first. I am all hungry,’ Dheeraj wanted to escape any further conversation. ‘Oh yes! How stupid of me. Sampat, get the car from the parking. We will wait near the exit.’

Ria’s attention drifted towards the halting sound of the car. The shower had also thinned down to a slight drizzle now. The bolt slid and doors opened. Sampat kaka placed the suitcase in the room done for Dheeraj.

‘Where is Ria, kaki?’

‘Where can she be but in the whole world! Behind. In the verandah. You know the place Dheeraj. Go and meet her. I will get the tea and snacks there only. Sampat, place some more chairs and table behind.’ Shobhna retired to the kitchen.

‘Ria,’ Dheeraj called hesitatingly. They were never friends. A mere acquaintance, she was the daughter of one of his neighbour. Ria stopped rocking the chair resting her bare feet to the cold floor. Her heart skipped a beat hearing Dheer. She did not expect him to meet her so soon. Her blank but most beautiful blue eyes in the world moved in the direction of Dheer. ‘Dheer, how are you?’ She spoke and her tuneful voice fell on his ears like a never heard euphony. With tinkling of the wind chime in the background, the slight chilly but gentle wind was blowing the strands of her black hairs which remained untwined falling deliriously on her endearing face. Her reluctant smile caught Dheer instantly. The moment stilled, as if, time forgot to move ahead. ‘I don’t know whether to curse God that he deprived such a beauty to see how the world around reflected on her or count my blessings that there is someone who would remain unbiased on my shortcomings.’ Dheer couldn’t stop the thought crossing his lit up heart and mind. The soul was no longer his. In that very moment his blemished face and conscious self became carefree of the burned mark which Dheer carried from his failed marriage. ‘Dheer, are you there?’ Ria’s voice pulled him out from his meandering thoughts. ‘O yes. I am very much here.’ Dheer shyly replied looking away as he realised that he stared at her a little too long but then immediately turned his gaze back to Ria’s face because he could actually do that.

‘So how have you been doing? Aai told you are a big doctor now.’

‘Big, I don’t know but I love what I do.’ His eyes still fixated, Dheer pulled a chair near Ria.

‘And what do you do doctor sahab?’ The glow on Ria’s smiling face shone on Dheer’s.

‘I am an eye surgeon and I specialize in treating the by birth blind cases. The pleasure of looking at their eyes with abundant dreams is unparalleled.’ The silence fell upon like a thunder receding Ria’s smile. A strong rapid pulsation gripped her all over, reflecting the sudden tumult inside. Small droplets of a lost hope showed up on her forehead, her hand felt wet inside against the old hands of the chair and throat went arid of any further conversation. The cacophony of dubious emotions inside her could not know a vent.

‘What do you think Dheeraj? Is the treatment possible?’ Shobhna appeared with a tray full of homemade snacks and tea.

‘I can’t say anything right now kaki. I will have to examine her in the clinic before commenting upon that,’ Dheeraj felt sheepish within as he thought of saying ‘No’ and dismissing the possibilities beyond. Ria sat struck and muted with the sudden developments. As if her life picked up pace unannounced. Observing the fury of reactions on her reddened face, Dheer comforted her. ‘Relax Ria. I know it is happening too fast and you have been kept back from the whole contrived developments but Shobhna kaki feared of your disapproval. I will examine you tomorrow in a nearby clinic here and then we decide what to do next”. Dheer spoke in a tailored fashion, professional and confident. Ria suddenly felt deceived and strings of her life detached from the roots without any inkling. As if, she had a new and unknown anchor. She was still speechless unable to react with the emergent tsunami of emotions. ‘But aai you could’ve told me? How many times you want us to go through the same disappointment?  Nothing is going to change. Dheer we don’t need any more false hopes,’ Ria’s voice rose with her heart venting out. ‘I am not giving any hopes yet Ria. Relax. Let me examine you tomorrow and then curse me as much as you want.’

The next day tension was building up in one of the rooms of Bhasker eye hospital.

Hope you are enjoying reading the story of Ria. Please visit here tomorrow for the next part.

Day 1. Sounds of Love - Part 1

So as promised here I am with a brand new season of blogathon. Errr… does it sound like opening of a reality show or tele series? Well I am thrilled to the core about this so even if it sounds like one, it truly pronounces my excitement. I haven’t blogged for months, and while I kept planning for the second season blogathon all this year, it never really happened. I am glad I made an announcement earlier this week and kicked my ass to own up this turf of mine. I write almost every day in some form or the other but somehow the happiness of posting a blog here is unparalleled. The sheer idea of connecting with your readers over a blog or any form of writing for that matter, lifts up my mood on any gloomy day. In fact it does give an unbeatable adrenaline rush to write here and thereafter see the performance on the post. I am a bit stuck up kinda person when it comes to stats. If not completely, then partially they do raise up my happiness quotient. So while this month is going to unleash one post here every day, it guarantees 31 days filled with excitement, boisterousness and happiness. And what all I promise to offer? Short stories, poetry, some photo features, memoirs and … well not planned beyond this. But would love to surprise myself. So lets get go….

Let us begin with a simple and honest smile. A smile which would light up this moment. Let us live this moment right here right now free of all the stress and negativities which life throws on us and be in peace with our inner self, our inner child. I share a beautiful quote I came across this morning.

           

[Image courtesy: goodngreat.com]

Just a food for thought… Instead of mulling over the unhappiness brought forward from the past, let us create a better today which will give us happier memories tomorrow and an inspiration to dream for a bigger and better tomorrow. We are the creator of our lives so lets paint anew, brighter portrait of our future with myriad hues.

On the first day of the blogathon I bring you the story of Ria in Sounds of Love….

[Image courtesy: www.pixelstalk.net]

The tiny water droplets on the tin shed were gaining volume infrequently, altering the noise of their splatter every time. The cool monsoon breeze swirling around the wind chime made the tinkling music change chords frequently. Her soul reverberated with the enchanting tunes of the wind chime which created a distinct symphony every time.  Ria loved it and every little thing which came along with this season. The drunk muddy smell of the satiated earth, the overindulging breeze, the drops falling on her sensuous beautiful face, water running across the toes through the strings of the loafers. Everything about monsoons was surreal and somehow connected her deep within. She could spend her entire life getting soaked in the romanticism of this weather. The skies flashing above along with all the accompanied drama is what she wanted to see. She wished to see the myriad coloured greens which spilled over every nook and corner of her little world. Sampat kaka told it looked beautiful. The misty mornings which she smelled, getting drenched in supernal happiness, the blur on foggy day, and how it appeared when the hills beyond enjoyed the incessant showers but the world this side was still athirst for it. Above all she wanted to see the most doting eyes in the world which were of her aai, Shobhna. They were Ria’s gateway to the enchanting world around. Since the day doctors divulged the news of Ria’s inability to see, Shobhna’s life had only one dream, to get Ria’s eyes treated, but nowhere she got a positive reply. Once again she was building hopes with Dheeraj returning back from abroad after finishing his studies. He was now an eye surgeon. Dheeraj was the only son of Kulkarni’s, their neighbours of decades. The family had moved five years back and settled in Delhi after Dheeraj relocated years ago to pursue higher studies.

‘Ria come inside and wear something warm. We will be leaving in another 10 min,’ Shobhna shouts to make herself hear over the noise of rain knocking on the tin shed, but Ria continues to sway on the rocking chair in the verandah. She could sit here for hours like a silent ghost, detached but alive and feeling every bit of it.

‘Aai, I don’t want to go. Why are you forcing me?’ Ria replied. Her voice lowered hearing Shobhna approach.

‘Okay don’t come. As it is, the rain doesn’t seem to stop for another few hours.’

Ria called him Dheer. They grew up almost together being immediate neighbours but in their respective worlds. They met at family get together and other important occasions. At times the conversations ran out across the common fence, when Dheer inquired about her well being. It cheered her up instantly but even she knew he is just being courteous. Ria’s solitude and aai’s pep talks made her strong, mentally senesce but at times she had her moments of despair.

Ria was just twelve when Dheer left Najod. Nothing changed for either of them.

‘We are leaving Ria. Will be back soon.’ The door panels clasped each other and got bolted from outside.

Few kilometers away at the Najod railway station, the signals were turned green to flag in, the train coming from Mumbai.

If you liked the piece here, please do visit tomorrow to see the story progress…

Till then have a kicking day ahead. Enjoy the romanticism of rains if it is raining in your city and if not hope for one. Wishing you a good day ahead, I sign off for the day ….

Celebrating the 20K

Hi friends. I haven’t actually blogged this year. Life still continues to be a roller coaster ride. I have been busy doing a lot of varied things this year and have some big plans for the rest of the year as well (the major in this list is my annual half marathon and the preparations are in full swing). I wrote some long short stories, have been writing for the web, did an online workshop to unleash the artist within, experimented with other forms of art, did a few artist dates with myself, got into writing the daily journal and now have been struggling with the status of a forced single mother of two cute brats. I kept planning and postponing a blogathon all this while to kick myself writing here, never realizing that the year is just slipping by. I was almost sure that if I am not writing, obviously there is no one reading the pages here but to my surprise, the viewership on the blog has been consistent with few major peaks as well. This is a special gratitude post for all my silent and anonymous readers who have been dedicatedly showing on my turf.

So why am I writing today? Because I returned after a long time only to be pleasantly surprised that the page view of my blog has crossed another milestone. It feels special today because although at very slow pace but my blog has touched the 20K mark. A BIG THANK YOU to all my readers till date who have helped me achieve this feat. Getting into the blogging world opened new paradigm of life for me and the journey has been splendid. I haven’t written much but have been reading a lot. 68 posts in a span of 3 years is not a good score but I enjoyed connecting with other fellas in the blogging world which was entirely new to me. I got introduced to blogging because I stumbled upon ‘Life is what you make it’ by Preeti Shenoy and got absolutely smitten by the author, her writing style which kept me hooked on till the end of the book and her attitude towards life. Visiting her blog every morning became a part of my life which is when I was drawn towards this entire world of blogging. I started following more blogs and as I always had a little writer inside me too, I donned this new identity in my life. I was going through a rough patch in my life when I started writing here and it did help tremendously in overcoming the identity crisis which I was facing at that point of time. The memories are still vivid of how my first post came up. So with fond memories of inception of this part of my life and also wishing myself luck for longer innings, I dedicate this post to Preeti Shenoy, my inspiration in blogging and hope that I show here more often.

Well, I have been planning for long to do a blog marathon and the time just looks perfect for that. So I announce a blog marathon in the month of October and hope to offer you some interesting reads in this season. 

A Mandala for soul

People have been asking me reason for not being seen in the blogging world for long. Yes, have not been writing that often and whatever words surfaced have not shown up here. Lets not go digging the W's behind. I am a creative person and of late have been experimenting with the other forms in an artist's blissful world. My tools have been my palette, some soulful music and words O Yes! words those magical, magnificent words. How can I do without them. So here's one of my latest work. Tried working with the spiritual Mandala Art. It has been an ecstatic time spent with some great Sufi Qawallis and doing my first Mandala art. What a therapeutic experience it was! I am not that good with colours but this one was just for me and I enjoyed it to the fullest. Hope you like it too.

  

I am Loving and Lovable too

O great creator
In thy name I write
To be healed and to emerge
To forget and to know myself
To know and to be led
I surrender all of me
To let loose in thy hands
In this day of life where I struggle
Everyday in pursuit of happiness
And of love and togetherness
O great creator
It is thy help that I seek
To pull me out of the hours of darkness
And lead through the light of your creation
And help me to create too
Love me 
I am loving and lovable too